


Made For Fevering

by octoberdrew (SilverStreaksofStardust)



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Cake, Lashton - Freeform, M/M, Muke - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-21
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2018-11-17 02:02:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 13,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11265642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverStreaksofStardust/pseuds/octoberdrew
Summary: "It was easy, making Luke blush. Michael loves it." / Muke-centric one-shots with some Lashton and Cake tossed in. Yeah, that's pretty much it.





	1. How To Make Luke Hemmings Blush

**How To Make Luke Hemmings Blush  
( Muke )**

Currently, Michael and Luke were sitting on the couch. They were both on their phones, checking up on their social media accounts. At least, that's what Luke assumed.

He could see Michael glancing at him every five seconds or so, a smile playing across the green-haired boy's lips. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." Michael grinned.

"What are you looking at?"

"Do you want me to read it to you?"

"Sure." Luke somewhat regretted his answer as soon as the words left his mouth, but he was curious. Maybe it was news about another performance or something.

Michael cleared his throat, probably savouring the impatience venting from the blond. "'How Do You Like It?' By 'don'tgetovermejustyet'.

" _Michael caressed Luke's face, and then pushed the younger boy against the wall. Luke whimpered, a low moan escaping from his mouth_ -"

"Michael!" Luke huffed, covering his ears. "Stop it!"

"What?' Michael looked up innocently from his phone. "You wanted me to read it."

"Stop reading Muke fanfiction."

"I can do whatever I want."

The blond gave his sad face. "I'm leaving."

"No." Michael tugged on Luke's arm.

"Then stop reading fanfics."

"Fine. Alright." Michael pulled Luke on his lap, nuzzling his face on Luke's shoulder. "But I ship it."


	2. It's Called Payback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luke accidentally makes Michael hard (well, maybe it wasn't an accident) and the boy returns the favour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is mainly Muke one-shots, with a side-pairing of Cashton. There may also be some Lashton and Cake, but we'll see. Idk, I just really ship Muke at the moment.

**It's Called Payback**  
**( Muke )**

"I love _Mean Girls_ ," Luke sighed happily, snuggling in my chest. We just watched the movie for, like, the hundredth time this month. I could recite the lines along with Luke now, and secretly I loved it.

I laughed, playing with Luke's hair. "You say that every time."

"Because it's true!" Luke blinked, looking up at me. Our mouths were so close that I considered connecting them. But that was weird, because we were just friends. "You know what we should do?" Luke's voice dropped to a huskier tone, suggestive.

Although he mostly looked adorable, it was sexy to see Luke bite his lip. I loved the way Luke innocently suggested something dirty. "And what's that?"

"We should..." Luke's head dropped on my lap. I was pretty sure that he could feel my hard-on, but if so, he didn't mention it. He was teasing me by licking his lips. I couldn't take my eyes off of them, especially with the way his tongue was toying with the lip ring. "We should watch Dora."

"Hm... What?"

His blue eyes were filled with mischief. "I just said _Dora_. Are you even listening, Mikey? You're just staring at me." His head shifted, and I almost let out a moan.

"Fuck you, Luke."

"You'll like that, won't you? Too bad, because we're watching Dora."

"We don't even fucking have _Dora_ movies!" I glared.

He sat up. "Fine. _How I Met Your Mother,_ then."

I grabbed his hips, and pinned him against the couch. "You do not get to do that to me and get away with it."

"You mean I made you hard just because I mentioned a kid's show? Wow, you must really be in a horny mood."

I smirked, resting my hand over Luke's crotch. He swallowed, shifting his hips to face mine. His playful mood was over, but mine wasn't. I widened his legs apart and went between them. "Payback is a bitch," I said, my breath ghosting over his exposed neck. My teeth scraped gently against the soft skin, and I sucked, forming a hickey.

Luke's breathing went unsteady, letting a whimper escape from his mouth. I kissed the newly formed mark, before going off of him. "Michael. Don't. I-I can't—" There was a bulge in his pants, which I could visibly notice.

"Now, let's go to that episode with the 'mall song'. I love it. Really catchy."

Luke was completely silent, but gave me a glare. I just ignored him.


	3. Babying Luke Hemmings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Michael, Ashton, and Calum actually agree on something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really random. I don't know why I wrote this. I advise you to read the next chapter instead of this, yikes lol.

**Babying Luke Hemmings  
** **( Muke )**

"Hey, you know that Luke acts like a baby sometimes," Calum commented.

Michael slowly grinned, his green eyes sparkling. "Then why don't we treat him like one?"

Ashton crossed his arms. "Hey! We all know who's the Daddy of this band. _Me._ "

Michael rolled his eyes. "We all know you have a daddy kink, Ash."

The drummer blushed, but didn't deny the fact. "Whatever. I just think we should lay down rules. Like, what are you saying, Mikey?"

"We just baby-talk Luke. I think it'll be pretty funny. He'll get so annoyed, and maybe we can even act like we're serious."

Calum's brow wrinkled. "I don't really know. I mean, Luke can hold a grudge. I don't want our band splitting up."

"We'll make up by buying him a gift or something." The red-head was enthusiastic about the idea.

Ashton slowly nodded his head. "I'm in all the way. How about you, Calum?"

The kiwi boy had a thoughtful look. "Okay."

* * *

Luke scrolled through his phone, on his Instagram account. He felt nervous about interacting with his fans online, afraid he'll post something he'll regret online.

Biting his lip, he saw some fans commenting on how he looked cute. A blush stained his cheeks as he looked at all the nice comments.

"Hey, Luke."

Luke looked to see Ashton smiling, and going in front of his bunk.

"Hi!" the younger boy greeted back.

"Are you on your phone? You should put your electronics away at nine."

"But it's only noon. Besides, we all go on our phones past nine o'clock." Luke was unsure what Ashton was trying to get at.

The drummer stared. "Don't talk back at me, or I will make you sit in a corner."

"I'm not a little kid!" Luke felt a bit frustrated and confused. "Ashton, what's going on?"

Ashton glared, and snatched the phone out of Luke's hand. "No phone for a week! It's rude to be disrespectful at your elders."

"You're only two years older!" Luke pouted, sticking his bottom lip out. "Please, Ash? I want my phone." Usually his begging face did the trick with Ashton. He knew that Ash didn't like making him upset.

"Fine." Ashton sighed, handing it back.

Luke beamed.

...........

"You fucking suck at being a dad," Michael said. He and Calum were watching the scene unfold, and once Ashton came back, the drummer wore a huge silly smile.

Ashton shrugged. "I can't help it! He used that face! Like, I mean, nobody can be mad at a pretty face. It's no fair!" He covered his eyes in his arm, embarrassed.

 "Watch and learn," Calum sassed, and strutted towards Luke.

Luke raised his eyebrows. "Calum! I just talked with Ashton. He acted really strange. Do you know what's—"

 "I think it's your nap time!" Calum reported.

"Uhm, we don't really have a nap time. But I wouldn't argue with that." Luke set his head on the pillows, making himself comfortable.

"Do you have your penguin?"

"Mm hm!" Luke held his stuffed penguin up.

"Good." Calum tucked Luke in, the blond giving a quizzical look.

"It's really hot."

"Well, I don't really care so go to sleep." Calum couldn't help but get his sassy comment through. He walked away.

"This day is really weird," Luke muttered under his breath. He closed his eyes.

\--------------

Michael waited until it was his turn. He smirked when he saw Luke sleeping; he looked so cute. Like, not that way—Michael definitely did not have a crush on the younger boy.

Luke's nose twitched, and his eyes blinked open. "Mikey? What time is it?"

"Five."

"I slept for two hours?" Luke rubbed his eyes. "Wow, I must really be tired."

"Well, your bed time is at nine so you still have some time."

Luke laughed. "Is there a reason why you all act like I need attention? I'm sixteen; I can take care of myself."

Michael shook his head. "Come on, Luke. You must be hungry."

"Did we get pizza?"

"That's not healthy for you." Michael led Luke to the main room with couches.

Luke plopped on the couch, stretching. "You're not healthy either."

Michael searched in the cupboards, and found baby food jars which Calum and Ashton went out and bought. He grabbed one and a spoon. Once he went back to Luke, he held out a spoonful of the mush. "Open up."

"What is that?" Luke squinted his eyes. "Is that... Mushed up puke?"

As he was speaking, Michael shoved the food in his mouth.

"Ew!" Luke retreated, spitting the food out. "That tastes disgusting!"

"It's puréed tomatoes with squash." Michael frowned. It did sound disgusting.

"Could I eat normal food?"

"No."

Luke rolled his eyes. He stood up, but Michael yanked him back down.

"Finish this and you'll get dessert. How does that sound?"

"It sounds like a bribe." Luke sighed, but obeyed. "What's the dessert anyway?"

"Chocolate pudding."

"Gross."

\------------------

The next morning, all three boys found their "baby" eating his baby food.

Ashton's mouth dropped.

Luke looked up. "I actually like the taste now." He stood up, and went to throw the empty jar away.

Michael's eyes were glued to Luke's ass. He really wanted to spank it.

Calum whispered, "I think our plan is somehow working."

 


	4. I May Be Your First (But Certainly Not Your Last)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You'll do anything to keep your secrets hidden.

**I May Be Your First (But Certainly Not Your Last)  
** **( Muke + Cake (past) )**

"Why?" Michael asks in disbelief. "I can't believe you did it... with _him_."

"Michael, it didn't mean anything - I mean, we weren't even a thing back then."

"Calum never told me. He tells me everything."

"Everything?" Luke raises his eyebrows. "That doesn't -"

"Shut up, Luke. Don't change the topic." Michael runs a hand through his hair. "How long did you... you know. Have the relationship."

The blond shifts on the couch. "Maybe a month." It's a small lie.

Michael licks his lips, not because he's nervous but they're dry. "Fine, whatever. It's in the past. Besides, Calum's with Ashton."

"If it helps, you can have your first time with me!" Luke gestures Michael over.

The red head boy suddenly looks shy. "I don't know. I mean... I look horrible."

"No you don't," Luke says firmly. He goes off the couch and tugs on Michael's hand. "We'll go upstairs."

A bit nervous yet excited, Michael and Luke head to the bedroom.

The blond bites his lip in a seductive manner. "Just sit on the bed and relax."

"Huh? Alright."

Luke goes on his knees.

"Shouldn't you get, uh, a condom?"

"Condom?" Luke looks confused. "I thought this was a blowjob."

"But I thought you said that we were going to do... you know. The thing."

"But... we are? It's your first time getting a blowjob, right?"

Realization dawns on Michael. "Holy shit Luke, so you didn't have sex with Calum? You though that 'first time' meant a blowjob?"

Luke turns red. "No, I thought it meant going to another stage, like anything sexual."

Michael knows he needs to educate Luke, but has to go straight to the point. "So you didn't have sex with Calum?"

"Of course not."

The older boy frowns slightly, wondering what he should do next. "Can you still give me a blowjob?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully this chapter wasn't confusing, but basically Luke says his first time was with Calum. The blond assumes that 'first time' meant first time doing something sexual with somebody. However, Michael's version of 'first time' meant sex. So, uhm, yeah.


	5. * The Noise You Just Heard Was Nothing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Michael teases Luke while the blond is talking on the phone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So, my phone has been missing and I was absolutely in a mood - meaning I acted pretty shitty and was stressed out. (hey tøp). Luckily it was found, thus this update came along.

*** The Noise You Just Heard Was Nothing  
** **( Muke )**

The phone call startled Luke. He was not at all prepared for it, which was evident enough, with his pants drawn down and Michael stretching his entrance.

"Ignore it," Michael said, continuing the preparation.

"What if it's important?" Luke grunted, reaching over his nightstand and grabbing his phone. "Hello?"

"Hi, Luke. Is everything alright over there?"

"Uh, yes mum." Luke swatted Michael's hand away.

"That's great. Listen, I was talking to one of your former teachers. She was wondering about doing a school reunion, doesn't that sound great? I called Calum's mom - they're attending, too. Maybe you can also ask Michael. Ashton can be a guest, of course."

"Amazing." Luke almost gasped when he felt Michael grab his hips.

"Do you think you can make it? I know that you all have been very busy, but it sounds very nice."

Luke personally didn't want to see his old school again; it was going to be awkward. Besides, wasn't a school reunion supposed to be ten years later or something?

Michael started to move inside Luke, and then out, making Luke groan and then curse.

"Are you okay Luke? You sound distracted."

Michael grinned evilly at Luke. "Hi Luke's mom!" he yelled.

"Oh, Michael! How's it going for you?"

"Well, your son is very lovely today. We're doing fine." Michael expertly thrusted into Luke without revealing the fact in his tone.

"We were just talking about a school reunion! I suppose I'll also talk to your parents, in fact I—"

As she continued to talk, Luke buried his face in the sheets, muffling his noises. He wasn't sure if he should hate Michael or not, because it felt so damn good.

Michael stopped momentarily, making Luke finish his conversation.

"— And she wore yellow! The colour everyone told her not to wear. Isn't that ridiculous? You know, Luke, it's days like these where I wonder how your cousin managed to become a scientologist."

"T-That's nice," Luke choked. "L-Listen mum, I need to go now."

"Okay. Just remember about the school! I love you."

"Love you too." Luke ended the call, and glared at Michael.

"You look mad."

"Fuck you, Michael."

"It's actually the other way around, isn't it?" Michael placed a kiss on Luke's shoulder.


	6. You Won't Know What's Going On (Unless You Look Under The Table)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's an effective way of making Luke shut up. If you know what I mean ;)

**You Won't Know What's Going On (Unless You Look Under The Table)  
( Muke )**

The band 5 Seconds of Summer were currently sitting at the dinner table. Although they usually lounged on the couch while eating, Ashton was tired of sitting on pieces of popcorn or, one time, a slice of unfinished pizza.

"This feels so formal," Michael commented. They were each on one of the four sides of the table. A tablecloth was placed over; white and long enough it nearly covered their laps. It was sure to get food stains, but nobody really mentioned it.

The cartons of Chinese food laid in the middle of the table, with cutlery beside it.

"Did we get any chopsticks?" Calum asked.

"No, we're going to use the cutlery," Ashton said. "I think we can do that this one time."

The rest of the three pretty much went with it because, hey, nobody argued with the oldest of the band. Besides, the drummer was pretty adamant about this.

Luke grabbed himself a carton. Since it was mostly silent (which he hated), he began to talk enthusiastically. "Guess what I did today!"

"Wank," Michael said flatly.

"Go on Twitter," Calum guessed.

"What did you do?" Ashton regained control of the conversation.

"Okay, so I saw this meme from—"

"Oh kill me now!" Michael shouted. He grabbed a dish of the chow mien. "You know what's more exciting? Playing video games and avoiding social interaction."

"I think I saw that meme," Calum beamed. "Was it the one you sent?"

"Yeah! I—"

"Shut up, Luke." Michael took a bite of his meal.

"I can say whatever I want," Luke pouted.

Michael raised his eyebrows. "Shut up."

"No!"

"Shut up!"

"No!"

"Guys, we're trying to have a meal." Ashton gave a Look. "Can we just enjoy it?"

Michael stuck his tongue out childishly. "I will as long as Luke stops talking."

Ashton began to eat beef with broccoli. "I enjoy Luke speaking. Go ahead, Luke."

Encouraged, Luke started to tell a joke he found funny online. The humour was kind of lost, though, with the glare given on his left.

Michael scooted his chair closer to the younger boy. "Hey, Luke, gimme some Singapore noodles."

Surprised at the gentler tone, Luke held the carton out. As Calum and Ashton began to strike a conversation about music, attention away from the other two, Michael slid his hand down and rested a hand on Luke's thigh.

The blond gave a questioning look. "Michael, what are you doing?"

Michael smirked, ignoring the question. He crept his hand further down until it went over Luke's crotch. Kind of shocked, he found it already hard.

A blush crept on Luke's face, as he pulled slightly away.

With the newfound information, Michael started to palm through the rough denim.

Luke let out a gasp, and bit his lip.

"You seem quiet now," Michael whispered.

"M-Mikey—" Luke whimpered.

"So guys, what do you think?" Ashton turned his gaze to the two, not suspecting what was happening.

"Hm..." Michael expertly undid the button of the jeans and slid his hand in.

Luke looked like he was ready to explode, entirely red.

"I don't really have an opinion yet. How about you, Luke?" The green-haired boy looked innocently at the blond.

"I-it's good? I mean... shit!" Luke jerked forward, responding to Michael's actions.

Michael calmly retreated his hand, and continued to eat.

"I hate you Michael," Luke hissed.

"No, I think you love me."

"Aw guys, why can't you get along?" Ashton sighed.

"That's impossible." Luke awkwardly shifted his hips. "I need to go to the washroom." He quickly went away.

Michael smirked to himself. "This tastes really good."

"Ooh, could I try some?" Calum asked, racing over.

"Would it be cliché if I say that revenge is sweet?" Michael wondered out loud.

Ashton gave a confused look. "Yeah, that's pretty old..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, poor Ash... so oblivious. Actually, that might be fortunate but y'know. So lately I've been reading Lashton and loving it so I might write a one-shot. I mean, after watching the '30 Iconic Lashton Moments' on YouTube they're so cute and ugh... I'm dying.


	7. This Is What You Want

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter includes somebody wetting himself (but not kinky or anything). So if you are uncomfortable with this for some reason, do not read. And seriously, thank you for reading. xoxo

**This Is What You Want**  
**( Muke )**

Luke seriously should have seen this coming. He was thirsty (no, not the good kind), and carried a water bottle in his hand for most of the day. Occasionally he got to go to the washroom, but for the most part, the band was on the road. They did a lot of interviews, so he was used to giving the appropriate answers and trying to look lively. But seriously, he had to pee really badly.

Basically, the whole band was tired. Moving to places was a thing they were used to; adjusting to the time zones or sneaking in naps during the day.

However, at the moment, all of them were in a car, going home. Or the place they lived in, technically, because Luke always considered Australia his home.

"Oh, fuck me, I need to piss!" Michael unnecessarily shouted.

Luke eyed his newly found competitor. All of them had to share one bathroom. It was sad, really. At least he had an advantage: he had long legs, so he could go a longer distance.

"I need to go too," Ashton said. "It'll only be a second."

"What!" Luke said. "I also need to go."

"Me too!" Calum added, then laughed. "Just kidding."

Ashton gave an authoritative look. "Look, I'll go first, then you two settle it amongst yourselves who goes next."

"Dibs!" Michael immediately yelled.

"You can't do that!" Luke felt his bowel ache. "We'll let Calum choose."

"Whoa, I'm not in this." Calum saw both of his friends look at him desperately. "Look, who needs to go the most?"

"I might wet myself!" Luke shouted, causing the rest of the three members to look at him strangely. He reddened. "I really need to go."

"So do I!" Michael huffed. "Look, do you see how bad I need to go?" He jumped in his seat, crossing his legs.

Luke slumped in defeat. "Argh, okay fine. But hurry up."

Once the band made it in the house, Ashton darted in the washroom, locking the door.

Michael and Luke stood outside. Both of them were in a horrible state, holding it in. Luke held his crotch, leaning against the wall for support.

Michael did the same, but was yelling. "Ashton! Fuck you! Fuck fuck fuck!"

Eventually the bathroom door opened, Ashton frowning. "Michael, I told you not to swear. Did—"

"Fuck yeah!" Michael darted in the washroom, not bothering to close the door.

Luke whimpered, feeling pressure in his lower area. A bit of urine slipped out, and he groaned. "M-Michael..." He could hear the streaming from the older boy, which made his head pound. He _really_ needed to go. _So bad_.

How long did Michael need to pee anyway?

He shifted upwards from the wall, ready to yell obscenities. However, Michael finally went from the washroom.

Luke's muscles relaxed because he could go, but that was a mistake. Once he started to move, he couldn't hold it in any longer. He started to pee his pants, and humiliated, he just let it happen. It soaked his jeans, urine slipping down his clothed legs and turning the black denim darker. It turned cold with the humidity, and uncomfortable, Luke had no idea what to do. He felt like a really small toddler, embarrassed and about to cry.

The dye-haired boy watched everything, an odd look flashing across his face.

"I-I'm sorry..." Luke's entire face was red, because he peed his pants in front one of his close friends. Michael was not going to live this down. He choked a sob, wishing he could hide or something. The very least it could be Ashton to have seen it, even Calum; just not Michael.

"Hey, it's okay. Uh..." Michael was still staring at the younger boy's jeans. "I'll get you a new set of clothes."

Luke awkwardly went in the bathroom, sliding down the damp clothing off of him. Tears started to slide down his face. He couldn't believe he wet his pants.

Michael came back with a pair of boxers and sweatpants. "I got my clothes 'cause it was the quickest." He closed the door, and gestured to Luke. "Take your underwear off."

Luke didn't dare look up to see a taunting stare, or maybe concealed smirk.

" _Luke_." Michael walked closer. "Don't be embarrassed. This happens to a lot of people. I wet my pants before."

Luke timidly looked at Michael, seeing a caring look. It was rare to see, mostly because both of them bickered like siblings or exchanged neutral glances.

"Just... I won't tell anyone, okay? I promise."

Luke wiped his nose, nodding his head. He was afraid if he spoke, he'd fall apart again. It was known between the band mates that if one of them started to cry, it was a serious matter.

Michael placed the fresh clothes on the counter, and pulled Luke's underwear down. The blond shifted uncomfortably, exposed for a while.

"Is this weird? This isn't weird, right?" Michael rambled, seeing that Luke remained silent the whole time. "Just clean yourself up and come back out, okay? We can play FIFA or something."

"Yeah. 'M tired, though."

Michael smiled at the way Luke's voice cracked. "Hurry up, then. Maybe I'll kiss you goodnight."

When the brunet left, Luke wiped himself a wet towel. He considered showering, but mainly he wanted to sleep and forget what happened. After he changed, he felt kind of happy.

He went in the bedroom which he shared with Michael, and saw the older boy with a phone.

"Hey," Michael said, looking up from the dim screen. "Wanna sit beside me?"

Luke immediately jumped on the bed and curled beside Michael, feeling newfound affection for him. This was one of the reasons why Michael was awesome. Luke liked it when Michael helped, and showed protectiveness.

"Do I still get a goodnight kiss?" Luke asked, liking the way he saw Michael's Adam's apple move, maybe from nervousness.

"Yeah."

Luke went under the covers, and Michael rolled on top of him. Their eyes locked, but it felt... weird. Something strange took over Luke, and he found that he had a sort of pain in his chest. His stomach tingled, pulse quickening.

"Goodnight," Michael said in a teasing tone, and brushed his lips against Luke's. It happened for a millisecond, but Luke refused to let it go for that long.

The younger boy recaptured the lips, wanting to know what it felt. To kiss a boy. To kiss _Michael_. Their kiss was sloppy, teeth clashing and tongues in the way but they weren't trying to be romantic. It was purely for curiosity and the taste of each other.

" _Hm_." Michael nipped at Luke's bottom lip, causing the blond to whine. "Luke, don't."

"W-Why?" Their chests went up and down in synch, trying to process what just happened.

Michael eyed Luke, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. He slowly ground his hips against Luke's, brushing his hard-on against another.

"Holy," Luke breathed.

Michael laughed, but stopped his motions. He'd probably regret it the next morning, mainly because Luke could also get revenge.

"Uhn." Luke groaned, moving his head to the side. He tried to think of ways to undo his problem. Maybe think of spiders, or something. He laid his arm over his eyes, so he couldn't see Michael.

"Stop ignoring me." Michael rose up a little, and began to nuzzle his head against Luke's chest.

This was really not helping, because Luke got even more excited.

Unfortunately, they didn't hear or see Ashton coming in with a camera until it was too late.

"Uh... Michael? Michael?"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The thing is, I went for 2014 appearances / timeline. Originally Michael had green hair. However, I added one of the 5sos keek moments, which was when Ashton discovered Michael with Luke in the bedroom, and wanted to implement it into this story. I know there was a lot of interviews in 2014, though, so just know that I'm aware the way it goes sounds pretty. odd.


	8. Eyes On Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Michael likes to visit clubs and sees a blond performing quite well at one.

**Eyes On Me  
( Muke )**

Michael plans on getting drunk, fucking some dude, and then sleep. Really, his plan sounds nice. He's spent two weeks without sex, and seriously, that's a mistake. It isn't that he can't live without sex, no; he just wants another person. Someone that can give him interest long enough to make love.

Michael's been to clubs lately, since assumably they are the easiest place to get laid. However, most of them have straight guys with girlfriends, gay guys with boyfriends, straight guys in denial—whatever.

There's, like, a lot of clubs in LA though. Michael doesn't expect this one to be any different, but there's still a sliver of hope. There's a bouncer monitoring people, and Michael is let through after showing his ID.

Michael's twenty, so considering some things, it should have been easy to find some hot gay twink. He has a eyebrow piercing, hair dyed red, good enough clothing—in fact, quite honestly, Michael considers himself attractive for society standards.

The inside of the club has dim lights, and slow and sensual music playing. After some realization, Michael looks at the stage set at the front, where the audience is watching. Okay, he's in a strip club. Nice.

He walks over to the bartender, asking for a 'drink that makes me see colours'. The man doesn't seem impressed with the wording, or even at Michael, and hands him a glass of cheap scotch.

Michael drinks it anyway, and requests for another one. He suddenly hears whistling and yelling, so he looks at the commotion. There's a performer on stage, who just got on.

Michael eye rapes the person, because oh god, he's kinda hot. Okay, that's a lie. He _is_ hot, probably the best good fucking looking guy ever. He has blond hair that looks silky and shiny under the lights. His legs are pretty much what Michael can see, though, from where the view is. They are really long, and a creamy colour.

"He's not worth your time."

Michael glances back at the bartender curiously. "Huh?"

"Luke Hemmings. He doesn't care about anybody."

"Why?"

"Everyone cares about money. The only way to get his attention is to have sex with him. He'll forget you the next day though."

The dude sounds bitter, so Michael guesses that he maybe had sex with Luke. And whatever, Michael doesn't want a long-term relationship. A fuck sounds nice, and even if Luke has STD's, it's YOLO. He places a twenty dollar bill on the counter, not caring about over paying for bad liquor, and heads into the crowd.

Luke knows how to keep attention on him, starting to play with himself onstage.

Michael salivates a little, eyes staring at the almost naked body. He turns red at the sexual moves, but doesn't look away. He wonders if Luke is secretly ashamed of doing this; using sex to get paid. Maybe that's why Luke doesn't stick with people - they just bring a bad reminder.

Some people start to throw money on the stage, and Michael winces. He tries to see if Luke looks humiliated, but the blond's face doesn't reveal anything.

Suddenly, for one single minute, Luke looks directly at Michael. Maybe it was five seconds, but Michael thinks it's more. Luke slowly smiles, and then looks away, picking up the money.

Something is off. But when Michael sees Luke's face again, Luke wears the same usual expression, kind of lifeless.

 _He understands that look_.


	9. In His Opinion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep in mind that I do not know the whole story. I only have information from YouTube videos. "5SOS on Luke" and "5 Seconds of Summer | Luke Gets Bullied". I think there was another video interview that just said that Luke was getting teased for his haircut and Ashton said "Leave the boy alone" so this won't be point-on-point.

**In His Opinion** **  
( Lashton )**

It was fair to say that, in some way, Ashton Irwin was a likable person.

This was an conclusion drawn by Ashton himself. He figured that he wasn't talkative, or really social, but people didn't mind. The most they could do was ignore him, because he wasn't special. Just a human being who sat in the back of all classes, minding his own business. In fact, it was like he was invisible.

Although it sometimes annoyed the blond that people could forget he was right there, for the most part it was okay. Ashton couldn't wait to pursue in a career, and work on what he loved. He figured that being a musician was a slim chance, so he took up photography. But still, he had a band called _Swallow The Goldfish_ , and they played and were really damn good in his opinion.

His friends were not as much as an enthusiast, though, about music. So their band only practiced whenever all of them felt like it, and it just became a thing that went down to two people: him and Will Stewart.

It was one day that Ashton didn't even realise was luck. Well; he'd call it luck because he met one of the most adorable and most amazing guy ever. In his opinion, again.

He and his friends went to the movies - they were seeing a _Pirates of the Caribbean_ movie or something; Ashton forgot but it was something with dudes fighting in it. Loud yelling. Explosions, maybe. Anyway, he didn't notice his surroundings; just focused on eating his popcorn and keeping it away from his greedy friends' hands.

"Dude, look at his glasses," one of his friends, Ian, laughed.

Ashton frowned, glancing to his right to see a guy about his age. The sunglasses were probably not in fashion, but it didn't look that bad. Floral green was kind of cool... but not really. The stranger looked flustered, obviously upset. Ashton didn't like it when people picked on others, especially when the victim was uncomfortable, so he gave his friend a glare. "Hey man, I like those. Leave him alone."

"His hair looks weird," Will muttered, contributing to insulting. His friends laughed.

"Leave the boy alone," Ashton said, saying it in a way that made it friendly-toned. That always did the trick—his friends paid attention to some other people instead, notably a few girls walking by. He turned back to the person. "Hey, I like your glasses man. Don't worry about it."

"Hi, I'm Luke," the boy mumbled, face still red.

Ashton smiled. Luke looked tall and skinny, kind of awkward. He was probably shy. "Hi, I'm Ashton."

Luke shuffled, his blue eyes flickering into brown ones before looking away. "Thank you."

Ashton wanted to say something, but the blond boy seemed distracted. He wondered if he could maybe befriend Luke, but they'll likely remain strangers. The funny thing was, he had no idea he'd be seeing Luke again.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Muke is my OTP.
> 
> I ship Lashton.
> 
> Cake is real.


	10. * Don't Hold Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whenever I read yaio smut, I can't help but smile. Or is that just me? Like, honestly. 
> 
> I'm wondering when Ashton would tweet again, and when Luke would tweet something instead of retweeting. But they (the band) never looked so happier on the stage, and it's amazing. They're tired, but still have enough energy to jump around on the stage. I love it when Luke's all over the place haha.
> 
> And Michael looked so genuinely happy it made my heart hurt (good way). He and Crystal are cute together imo, but I still love Muke too much. And Lashton. And Cake.
> 
> I think in the next chapter I'm going to write Cake, and then the remaining chapters are Muke.

**Don't Hold Back  
( Muke )**

" _Fuck_ ," Michael moans, grounding his hips against the younger boy's.

Luke shudders, accepting as much friction as he can. The skinny black jeans they wear constricts their growing hardness and movement, making them hate the clothing for a millionth time.

It's not like they loathe it, but it's another obstacle between them.

Michael glances around cautiously, and then grins. "We're alone."

They're at a park, a spot great for picnics. They decide it's better to visit at night time and not see the disapproving stares or distractions.

"We can't do it. Not here," Luke says, but he doesn't seem to be against it. He's humping against Michael's thigh, whining.

The red haired boy pulls away, causing the blond to frown. "Okay, let's just go back to our house and hear Ashton sing opera again."

Luke groans. "Mikey, _please_."

"Ashton doesn't want to hear us," Michael points out.

"That didn't stop us before." The younger boy tugs on Michael's shirt.

"If we do it, it's here," Michael challenges.

Luke licks his lips before nodding. "Okay."

Michael shakes out their black checkered blanket, making sure there's nothing gross on it when they make out.

Luke, however, feels impatient. He tackles Michael to the ground, initiating a long kiss. Their bodies become attached, legs intertwining and hands gripping onto each other.

Michael rolls on top of Luke, tugging off the black Nirvana tee.

Luke lets his head fall to the side, waiting.

"I'm gonna make you scream," Michael promises, tugging his own clothes off.

Luke fumbles with his own pants and boxers, settling them over his thighs.

"W-Which way?" Michael asks.

Luke goes on his hands and knees, biting his lip.

Michael smirks, tracing his fingers over Luke's bare hipbone. He earns a shudder from the body beneath him.

Luke is already prepared, member leaking and body positioned.

"Hm, you look so good." Michael gets lube from his pocket, and frowns. "Shit."

"What?" Luke asks.

"There's no condoms. Could you wait here? I'll come back, I promise."

"No, we don't need one." Luke meets Michael's gaze. "Just this once."

"Luke, if your mom finds out—"

"She won't." Luke rubs his back against Michael's chest. "Please."

"Fuck." Michael coats his fingers with lube. As he preps Luke, making sure the hole is loose enough, the blond keeps sucking his fingers in. He stretches and scissors, enjoying the escaped whimpers and moans.

"Please," Luke says.

Michael starts to enter at a steady pace. The breeze outside makes goosebumps on their skin. Michael feels adrenaline pump through his veins. He thrusts in deeper and slowly inching in, making Luke cry out. "Are you okay?" Michael asks.

"Y-Yes," Luke says. "Don't stop."

Michael smirks. "I swear if you say that again, I'll spank you."

Luke starts to laugh then winces. "Michael, it hurts."

"Your hole is so tight," Michael says. "Damn, you're like a virgin."

Luke takes a breath and then rocks himself against Michael, letting the huge member penetrate him more.

"You're doing good," Michael says. "Ugh, it feels so good." He keeps his hands on Luke's hips, matching Luke's pace. When he's fully in, Luke let's out a sigh of relief.

"Don't move yet," Luke says, adjusting to the size.

Michael isn't sure if he can follow that order. Luke's warm hole clenches around his member perfectly, and he wants to go in and out, finding more pleasure. Furthermore, hearing Luke moan loudly makes him hit orgasm much faster.

"Okay," Luke says, "you can move."

"Fucking finally." Michael comes out, and there's the squelching sound that makes him laugh for no reason. "That sounded gross."

Luke rolls his eyes. "Michael Gordon Clifford."

"Don't say my name like that."

"Because you hate your middle name?"

"Yeah."

" _Gordon_ ," Luke teases. "Michael _Gordon_ Clifford. Maybe your name should be Gordon."

"And yours would be Robert. Calum's would be Thomas."

"And Ashton's is Fletcher."

"Wow, our names are so boring," Michael snorts.

"Ashton has a decent name though." Luke coughs. "Should we get dressed or—?"

"Not yet." Michael pouts. "You distracted me."

"You were the one who ruined the mood."

"It's not my fault our anatomy makes weird noises." Michael pushes inside Luke again, determined to find Luke's spot.

Luke's brows furrow as he helps Michael hit his prostate. His hole tightens accordingly to whenever Michael moves in.

Michael growls, parting Luke's butt cheeks wider open for better access. "Is it okay if I go rougher?"

"Yes."

It takes a while before Michael gets the hang of a thrusting pace along with jerking off Luke's member. Michael wants nothing but to hear the sounds Luke makes when getting fucked.

"M-Mikey," Luke begs after a while. "'M so close."

"Shit," Michael groans. His hand drops away from Luke's cock and he grips Luke's hips. Rather than going deeper and slowly he goes in faster. It's a sloppy move, but Luke whines at one of the thrusts.

"T-There." Luke breathes.

"This?" Michael inches his body to the side for a better position, and pushes in.

"Y-Yes!"

With the newfound information, Michael smirks and starts to hit the same sensitive bump repeatedly.

Luke starts making noises and mewling. He's a wreck, eyes glazed and mouth part open. "Oh fuck, Michael. Y-Your—"

"S-Shut up," Michael pants. "Are you coming?"

"Uh..." Luke moans, trying to nod his head but he's enjoying the sensation. "Y-Yeah." There's a swoop in his stomach, and he comes, the white fluid shooting below him and some on his chest.

Michael comes a little bit after, right inside of Luke.

The blond shifts, uncomfortable with the fluid between his ass. "D-Do I have to walk home like this?"

"Fuck, that'll be so hot," Michael says. He rides them out, mostly for Luke's benefit, and then rests.

They clean themselves up, and Luke's face whitens. "Do they have cameras here? I mean... this is a city park."

"I don't think so?" Michael runs a hand through his hair. "Well, at least we'll be gone before they investigate."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, I posted this chapter in another story on Wattpad so if you've seen it please note that it is me. My secret account haha. Don't find me, it's cringey.


	11. It's Always You and Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't think I could survive without music in my life. Certain songs are powerful. They can be used to change your mood, or influence you. Bands definitely influence you.
> 
> Random Thought: I ship Luke with anyone, really. Even a taco.
> 
> But on a more serious note, I think... I ship Cake more than Muke now (if that's possible). Well, I think. But... I guess it's complicated.

["it's always you and calum" - cake, 'right now' • by Kim Taehyungie](https://youtu.be/JaTxL_ROf_A)

 * the video link above is a Cake video by Kim Taehyungie (according to username). it's so bittersweet and i could watch it over again and again. watch it!!! or not... but it's so amazing and i cry every time. so much feels.

* the 'title' is what Michael says in a interview. i thought it had so much meaning... especially for this chapter. and yes, i did the same. sorry. so much credit to Kim Taehyungie mainly because the video makes my love for Cake soar and, whoa, so much inspiration.

* * *

 

**It's Always You and Calum**

**( Cake )**

It is, technically, their fifth anniversary of dating.

Calum supposes that the first two years count—after all, they did date, but break up. Thankfully they caught up with each other months later and went back together. Honestly, he can't imagine _not_ being with Luke. He's used to cuddling 24/7, giving random kisses whenever they pass by each other in the house, and saying "I love you" in a childish voice with affection.

To celebrate, Calum organises it all, mostly because Luke probably won't remember (he forgot last year's, also, and Calum at last minute buys food from Macca's). But now this day is going to be more eventful. The older boy planned reservations months ahead at a restaurant, of course private just in case of any distractions. He figures if where they dine is cute and makes pizza both of them won't mind. Because hey, it's _pizza_.

Then after they'll go home, and that's where Calum really outdid himself (in his opinion).

Calum bought scented candles earlier that day, all lavender (mainly because the other choice was vanilla and that smelled terrible and strong). He placed them variously on the counter, in the bathroom, and bedroom. He's prepared, because... well, who knows where they'll end up when they have sex? The scent can definitely improve both of their mood.

Calum also buys red silk bedsheets, having them ready, and red roses. Although the flowers are totally cliché, he knows that Luke likes roses.

Already he can't wait to surprise his boyfriend. And maybe, just maybe, he can propose. That's the biggest surprise of all. Calum figures he should propose after they eat, so when they make love it would be more romantic.

A huge smile appears across his face. Luke is everything to him. He could finally say to everyone that Luke is officially his, and then maybe they can adopt a kid, and have twenty dogs— _wait, kids are kind of annoying_...

 _But Luke will probably want a kid, so_ —Calum gives a pause on his wild thoughts. That didn't matter now. Luke mattered. Hell, he'll probably agree to whatever Luke wanted.

Michael once teased and said to him that he was such a sappy idiot and complete wreck, but Calum shot back his own sassy comment about Michael and Crystal.

Personally Calum didn't mind that much teasing. It gives a reality that Luke is still his, and well, that's just unbelievable.

He still can't get over the fact that they met at school, and became friends. That's where it all started. Calum will always get jealous when Luke didn't pay attention to him, and back then he didn't know what that meant.

During the years of being a band, they'll always touch each other, cuddle or distract. When they finally realise each other's feelings... Calum sighs happily. It sounds like a perfect love story, but he remembers the nights of him crying when Luke was dating someone else. Thankfully that drama is over... at least, for now.

"Cake" still hasn't come out yet. And that's mainly because their band will take a mighty fall. Much of their fan base are females, and although most may be accepting, their image will be ruined. Since the young can get influenced easily, parents who are used to old traditions may not let their kids listen to music that contain a "gay couple" or whatever their management said.

All Calum wants to do is say that Luke is his, but he can't. And that's what frustrates him. Why can't he goddamn love his boyfriend, maybe fiancé? Their management did warn that it's bad for business if they still want to be a band, and Calum does understand. But he's sick of people making such a big deal about who's with who.

He wonders when Luke is arriving home, and he anxiously looks down at his phone, then back up. He has everything planned—but he surveys the room for a double check. Lights dim, Green Day music, drinks waiting in the cabinet...

 _Okay, maybe Luke's a little late_ , he thinks. He sends a text.

**hey where r u?**

If Luke isn't on his phone, then maybe he's out with a few people.

For some reason, Calum feels dread in his stomach. Something bad. He sends another text hopefully, and okay, he spams, hoping Luke finally answers. Damn, if Luke isn't home yet the restaurant plans are gone. He'll just pout about the reservations being wasted, but forgive after the night.

Calum passes time by sitting at the kitchen table, playing on his phone. Maybe Luke forgot...

He sends a text to Michael and Ash, asking if they know where Luke is, but they say no.  

When the doorbell finally rings, he almost falls out of his seat. He quickly gets up and smiles to himself. Coming in at the last minute, typical of Luke. And the blond probably forgot his key, which explains why there's tardiness.

When he sees blond hair and meets blue eyes, his smile sort of freezes. His disappointment is shown across his face almost immediately. _That's not Luke._

"Uhm, is there a problem?" Calum asks, looking at a police officer.

The Guy Who Is Not Luke gives a sympathetic look. "It's one of your band members, Luke Hemmings? He and another driver collided. Luckily, we can see that he's breathing, but there is some permanent damage. He's in the hospital right now."

The words become fuzzy, and all Calum can do is gape and stare.  _What?_ he thinks. _Luke is... Luke is in the hospital._

When it sinks in, his stomach gets queasy. "That can't be right. Luke isn't... he can't."

"I'm sorry. He must mean a lot." The Officer gives a small smile, but looks awkwardly back across the yard, waiting to leave.

Calum's throat burns from holding back tears. _Luke's hurt. I-I have to_ _help—I have to go to him._

"Would you like me to drive you to the hospital?"

Calum nods his head.

* * *

 By the time Calum arrives to where his boyfriend is, Luke isn't awake. Or asleep.

"He lost a lot of blood," the Nurse says. "We are very sorry for your loss. We did the best we could to regain his vitals. The damage is very high, though. The other driver was intoxicated. Luke was unlucky to be on the road."

Calum, like earlier, doesn't really listen. There's only key words that stick out, and it translates that Luke is dead. There's questions swarming in his mind, all collectively going back to Luke.

_What does he tell Michael and Ashton? What does he do now? What is he supposed to say? Was it his fault Luke is dead?_

He looks at Luke. The familiar blond hair that looks golden under a certain light.

The pale skin, the broad shoulders he likes to rest his head on, the lips that usually curve into a smile but are not right now.

 _The dimples that usually show, but aren't_.

 _The way Luke hugs, making him feel secure, and_ — _oh god._

His heart hurts so fucking much, and he hates it.

_This can't be happening._

The Nurse continues speaking, as if Calum isn't already heart-broken. "By a few witnesses, the car was swerving off the road. Luke saw, but couldn't drive away because he would put other pedestrians in danger."

 _Luke's dead_. Somehow, Calum can't accept that fact. _Why does Luke look so alive in front of him?_ He cautiously grabs Luke's hand, which is cold.

The monitor beeping is an annoying sound, but it plays in his head like a clock ticking. He carefully traces his thumb over Luke's soft palm, recognising the feel of the hand.

They hold hands a lot. Whenever one is scared, distressed, or just to show they love each other. It's kind of like they're supporting each other. 

The Nurse leaves. Calum can't stop crying.

" _Luke_ ," Calum says. "I-I—Please wake up. I love you and... I don't know what to do without you.

"It's always us. Together. D-Do you remember... Michael s-said..." Calum squeezes his eyes shut, trying to talk properly but he's out of breath.

He wants to hear Luke's voice... hear a joke, or hear a song. He really wants to see Luke's smiling face, the one that brightens up his whole day. He can't form a coherent sentence; it's hard seeing _this_ , hard believing what's happening.

"M-Michael said... 'It's always you and Calum'. I— _Please_. It's not anymore."


	12. Stained Blades Don't Get Cleaned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No matter how deep the cuts get, it still doesn't get rid of the terrible feeling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SLIGHT AU, SUCH AS CHANGES IN TIMELINE AND CERTAIN DATING RELATIONSHIPS (BUT NO NAMES ARE MENTIONED).
> 
> \-----
> 
> this chapter deals with an issue that i definitely don't want to get wrong about... whenever i read about self-harm in a story, i always cry. i'm not lying. even if the sentences are illiterate, has bad punctuation and spelling, i will always get sad. 
> 
> please, if you self-harm, talk to someone.

**Stained Blades Don't Get Cleaned  
( Muke? )**   

part i: 2014

 

The first time Luke tries to cut, he's afraid. He has a razor in one hand—clean and slightly sharp.

He looks at his wrist for a few seconds, as if it's a blank canvas ready to be ruined. The surface is pale. Free from bruises or scratches. Sometimes he wonders how people can do this every day.

His hand shakes too much as he brings the blade closer to his exposed skin. _Does he cut deep? Or make a single line? What if he accidentally hits an important vein?_

There's a stinging in his eyes—but he holds back the tears. He didn't even cut yet, and already he's breaking apart.

 _You're such a coward_ , _just do it_ , he tells himself.

Instead, he drops the razor back on the counter. 

" _Fuck_ ," he whispers to himself.

. . . . .

It's oddly silent in the house.

Luke's used to yelling from Michael's room—cursing about losing at a video game or even winning. Sometimes he thinks Michael yells just for the heck of it.

Calum usually wanders around the house pantless, and sometimes goes to Luke and they talk and giggle about the weirdest things.

Ashton can be found anywhere in the house; Luke has no clue what the older boy does or goes. As he heads downstairs, searching for at least one band mate, he can feel the room temperature go higher. There's a boiling pot of water on the stove, and Ashton's standing in front of it, observing.

It takes about five seconds before Ashton notices a presence. "Hey Luke, I'm going to make us soup for dinner," he greets.

The taller boy blinks. "Can you actually cook?"

"Yeah, it's really easy. You just chop vegetables and stuff." With that being said, Ashton demonstrates by cutting up a piece of lettuce.

Luke watches, in a trance. Ashton's fingers move deftly, expertly. He's kind of afraid that Ashton cuts himself but that doesn't happen. He's heard somewhere that a dull knife is more dangerous than a sharp one, but isn't sure if it's true or not.

"Do you prefer chicken or beef?" Ashton asks.

"Chicken."

"Knew it."

Luke bites his lip out of habit. "Is... Michael still with her?"

Ashton gives a questioning glance. "Are you asking if Michael and his girlfriend are still together? Yes, Luke. Haven't you noticed that Michael is happier?"

"Yeah, I did." It's hard not to. Michael smiles and laughs more than usual.

Honestly, it makes him sad that he has a crush. Especially when that's all it's ever going to be. Luke thinks it hurts the most when he's so close to Michael yet so far away. He likes playing with Michael's fluffy hair, the soft (currently mint green) strands standing up. He likes resting his head against Michael's shoulder, and likes making Michael smile.

But they're just friends.

Luke must have zoned out for too long, because the older boy clicks their fingers in front of his face.

"Are you okay?" Ashton asks.

"Yeah. I just didn't have that much sleep."

"Well, we are doing an interview tomorrow. For Saltscope or something like that." Ashton hums, returning back to stir the pot with a metal fork.

Luke thinks of getting take-out.

. . . . .

That night, they are all sitting on the couch watching TV. Surprisingly, they don't usually do this. They respectfully stay in their own space unless if they feel like hanging. However, maybe the exception is because Ashton wants them to taste soup.

Michael blatantly states it 'sucks' after seeing the vegetables, and Ashton pouts.

Luke tries it, and it actually does taste pretty good, maybe too much vegetables.

"This tastes amazing," Calum says enthusiastically, though maybe that's a bit biased because Calum will try anything. Ashton beams with pride.

Luke finishes his soup as well as Michael's. He leans back on the couch, feeling Michael's arm behind his neck. He glances at the coloured-hair boy, but there's no sign of recognition. He decides to enjoy it while it lasts. 

An animated series is playing on the screen, centering on a cartoon character family. They all laugh at the comedic moments, even though they've watched the episode before.

"Do you want another bowl, Luke?" Ashton notices that Luke is done.

Before Luke can say anything, Michael cuts in. "If Luke eats anymore he might get fat."

"Luke's in good shape," Ashton says in a defensive tone.

Michael snorts. "Whatever."

Luke feels his face burning. _Is he fat? Like, he knew he was when he was younger. But now?_

The show continues, but Luke isn't enjoying it anymore.

* * *

 

part ii: 2014-2015

 

 _He's getting the hang of it_.

Luke stares at the bright crimson. It contrasts against his skin. It's kind of like watercolours—when you do a single stroke, the colour bleeds over the white immediately.

A lot changes in two months. He finally cuts himself one night, not fucking caring because it fucking hurts seeing Michael with _her_ ; seeing them act sickenly sweet and kissing.

 _Why can't he just be happy for them?_  

He gets distracted by pain. It sort of helps. At first, he's terrified but there's an aching for a different feeling other than being heartbroken. He's tired of jealousy twisting inside of him, it's so unfair. But maybe he deserves it.

The cuts itch, but he always cleans them. He used to cut his wrists, but if he covers them with wristbands it irritates his skin so he switches to cutting his legs, mostly thighs.

Once he did serious damage because he was so angry, and there was a lot of blood loss. Luke got Calum, and they both went to the hospital.

Unfortunately, Luke has to tell Calum everything. But Calum promises not to tell anyone, on the condition that Luke doesn't cut anymore.

Luke agrees, but still does it anyway.

. . . . .

It's been a year. Michael doesn't have a girlfriend anymore. He's not that happy, but not that sad either. His hair is dyed red, his favourite colour.

Luke thinks that Michael is losing hair, but that's okay. Anyway, he doesn't like Michael that much anymore. At least, not in _that_ way.

It sometimes scares him how much he cuts. It's become addicting in a sense. If he misses a day, his skin feels uncomfortable and until he hurts himself the feeling goes away.

But he's in control. He finally can do something by himself, privately. Nobody knows. On some level, Luke wants somebody to notice. He wants help.

But if he does tell, his friends will probably think it's for attention. Why wold Luke cut? He's living happily, he has fans and has friends. His life is supposedly perfect.

Luke finds it difficult to respect himself. He hates how he's tall and people pay more attention just because of his height. It's like being judged; picked out from a crowd. He hates how fat he is, how he has to wear skinny black jeans and his stomach hurts every time.

Luke can't hide away from the news reporters, some who are nice but others who bring up unnecessary drama.

He's just human. If he was any other normal person, he'll be allowed to make mistakes and not having it being highlighted in a magazine.

The _5 Seconds of Summer_ band finish their second album, _Sounds Good Feels Good_ , and that's when Luke finally decides that he needs a bigger distraction. Maybe if he gets a girlfriend, he'll forget about Michael. 

Mostly, he's hoping that he'll forget about cutting. Some part of him knows he should stop, but he can't.

* * *

 

part iii: 2016

 

It happens by a stupid mistake.

Luke starts to cut on his arms, mainly because his legs are horrible to look at. It's riskier making cuts on arms because he has to explain why he's wearing a sweater in summer, but maybe he can lie about being cold.

He doesn't notice that the bathroom door's unlocked, slightly ajar, maybe because he never had an issue of someone coming in when he's cutting. The paranoia is lost - he's gone numb and used to keeping it a secret.

A voice, soft-spoken yet sharp, asks, "What are you doing?"

Luke immediately drops the blade in the sink and pulls his sleeves down.

 _That's totally not_ _suspicious at al_ _l._ He curses at his own stupidity.

"Luke? What are you doing?" Ashton walks in closer.

"Can't I have privacy?" Luke glares, but feels his arm stinging. He needs to clean it quickly. "What if I was peeing?"

"But you weren't. Besides, I really need to go."

"Fine, just wait for a few minutes."

Ashton shakes his head, as if he's a disapproving parent. His eyes slowly rest on the blade lying in the sink. He sees the red stain. His face is completely unreadable. "Luke..."

Luke slowly sinks to the ground, all the misery, anger, and hurt pouring out of him. _He needs someone_. _He needs help_. _He's such a mess_.

Wordlessly, Ashton grabs a First Aid kit and towel.

Luke feels like a little kid again, scraping his knee. Although this is different from a simple injury.

Ashton pulls up his sleeves, and wipes the wounds gently with a wet cloth. Luke winces but doesn't make a sound. After Ashton applies antiseptic cream, there's an awkward silence.

"I'm sorry," Ashton finally says, and he looks so genuine. Luke's confused. _Why is Ashton sorry?_ But Ashton hugs Luke, close, and it takes a moment before Luke begins to cry. 

"Please don't tell. _I'm so sorry_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * the first time luke tries to cut, it's an experience similar to someone i know. not exactly word-to-word, but the thing about trying to cut but you can't because you know what you're about to do and you're scared shitless. luckily that person doesn't cut anymore, and i am proud of him/her. 
> 
> note that's pretty long:
> 
> ashton irwin is a person i look up to. he is literally my inspiration; he is a beautiful human being, and i wish i have someone like him in my life. if you have seen, he posts on Tumblr his thoughts and they're amazing/beautiful. he has deep respect for everyone, and observes life positively. i just can't describe all he's done and it helps me a lot. everyone gets into a bad place, and only certain people help you out. with this being said, i may write another Lashton chapter because i feel like writing ashton's thoughts which surely may be deep on a level. i feel like he has a lot going in his head, funny or sad, weird or positive.


	13. In Between A World or Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He can't pretend not to see the marks or scars on Luke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vous êtes tous génial. Excusez-moi si mon français est horrible. Je ne parle pas français (ou écrire) plus. Si vous parlez français, aidez-vous s'il vous plaît. Merci.
> 
> That's everything that needs to be said. Désolé, je voulais juste une excuse pour taper en français.
> 
> Also, originally this was going to be Lashton but I couldn't find the correct place for Ashton and Luke to meet.

**In Between A World Or Two  
( Muke )**

* * *

Michael is sweet, funny, and one of the most happiest people Luke has ever met. This is only when he's sober, though. When he isn't, he becomes frightening, angry, and sometimes hurts Luke.

Luke wants to help his boyfriend with the drinking, but it's difficult. Michael will always leave every night, go out with some friends, and end up totally wasted. Luke hasn't officially met the friends yet, but knows that a few have wives or family. He wonders what happens to them.

Of course, when Luke directly brings the subject of drinking, Michael will always get defensive and upset. Michael's twenty, an adult, and can go drinking whenever he fucking feels like it. So Luke tries a different tactic, one subtle enough.

Luke always puts movies on during nighttime, or says he's lonely and wants company. It's true, but whatever. Michael sometimes stays, but once he sleeps, Michael will leave and come back later.

 _He can smell alcohol breath_.

Luke pretends that nothing at all happended when Michael the next morning will see the marks. He lies and says that he fell or some other excuse. Most commonly, he says he's an accident prone. 

Michael believes him, but has grown suspicious. There's only so much you can do to conceal the bruises and scars.

Luke wears shirts and sweatpants mostly around the house. Whenever they have sex, it's always at nighttime, lights off. If Michael finds out the real reason behind the marks... well, Luke doesn't want to see the guiltiness or hurt. They'll break up, and Luke doesn't want that at all.

Luke knows that Michael has been drinking since seventeen—his father was also an alcoholic. Luke somewhat understands that maybe Michael was abused. Michael never opens up about his past, though. 

* * *

The reassuring arms around Luke's waist are gone. The blond knows this, because he's secretly awake and pretending not to notice Michael studying him to check.

Michael sighs, getting up and presumably putting on clothes.

Luke quickly sits up. "Michael? Where are you going?"

"Uh, bathroom." 

"Then why are you getting dressed?"

"Because I'm cold."

 _There's a way to do this carefully. Luke has to not get Michael upset_. "Can we still cuddle?"

"Uh, yeah. It's just, I gotta get out and hang with some friends. I totally forgot to tell you."

"It's the middle of the night though..."

"Look, do you seriously want me to stay with you? You're fucking twenty years old, Luke, grow up."

Luke bites his tongue, but the response comes out anyway. "I know that you drink, every night. I know that when you come back home, you're a mess."

Michael scoffs. "Then why are you getting upset?"

"Because you shouldn't drink until you're stumbling and puking and... and really different." Luke gets out of bed. "I'm going with you."

"No! Fucking hell, all my friends think you're a little kid. Go back to bed, Luke."

"Either I'm going with you, or you're staying."

"Fine. Now that we're awake, let's go." Michael switches on the light to find his keys.

Luke hurriedly dresses himself, but before he can take a step towards the door, a hand grabs his shoulder.

"Luke? Why do you have bruises on your body?"

"I told you, I fell."

"How?"

"Down the stairs."

"There's no way that happened." Michael raises Luke's shirt up. There's an audible gasp. "Holy shit. Is someone hurting you?"

"No."

The red haired man crosses his arms. "Take off your pants."

"No." Luke fixes his shirt. "I'm okay, I promise."

Michael clenches his jaw. "Who's doing this to you? Luke. Answer me."

"'S no one. I mean, I just went into a fight with someone."

"Recently? Those are not old."

Luke shakes his head stubbornly. "Let's just go."

"Not until you tell me who it is."

"What's the point? You keep drinking, I keep getting hurt. There's no way this will ever end."

Michael lets out an exasperated sigh. "I can help you!"

"I'll tell you on one condition."

"What."

"You won't drink anymore."

"I can't do that."

"Why the hell not? At least don't drink until you pass out. I always have to see you at your worst, I always have to clean up after you! You have no idea what I do."

"Shut up, you don't know what I'm going through."

 _This is never going to end_. Luke looks down at the ground, terrified what the reaction will be. "I'm done with you. We're breaking up."

Michael grows silent, then laughs. "Are you serious?"

"Yes."

"But... what did I do? Luke, I'm sorry, okay! Please don't leave me. I promise I won't drink anymore."

It's funny, because those are the exact words that Luke heard when he tried to leave. It hurts so much, loving somebody who won't quit. Luke's used to being with Michael, talking and cuddling. Laughing and giving gentle kisses. But it's not like that anymore.

Luke looks up for a brief moment. He sees the scared green eyes, the messy hair and overall afraid look. He remembers comforting Michael when they were younger, sitting on his bed and complaining about how life is unfair. How Michael's father wouldn't stop drinking. How upset Michael was.

_"My mom said he won't quit," Michael had said. "She can't reach him anymore. They're only together because of me."_

Luke knows Michael needs someone. Luke can't walk out, because then Michael will be in an even worse condition. Seeing Michael vulnerable reminds Luke about his own promise, how he will do anything to help.

 _"I swear that I won't leave you. I'll always be here," Luke said_.

_Michael looked into Luke's blue eyes, trying to detect any lying. "Promise?"_

_"I promise that I love you. I promise I won't leave."_

Luke ends up apologizing, kissing Michael and crying. For the first time in months, Michael stays with Luke through the night.


	14. Love Letters & Heartache

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's actually a chapter before this one, but it wasn't completely written so... I moved on.
> 
> Also, I am lately being slammed with tons of homework and so updates are gonna be slow. Like, double slow than usual. The struggles of going to school.

**Love Letters & Heartache**

**( Muke )**

"I've been getting these weird notes lately," Luke said to one of his best friends immediately after joining at their usual lunch table.

Michael, who didn't seem fazed that there was no hello first, hardly looked up from his meal. "Really? What kind?"

"Love Notes, I guess."

"Maybe someone has a crush on you." Michael gave a small smirk.

Luke sighed, quickly jumping on to his already-assumed conclusion. "Don't tell me this was a prank."

"Hey, I never said it was."

"But your face says it all."

"Really?" Michael crossed his eyes and stuck his tongue out.

Luke laughed, but secretly felt disappointed. It would be kinda nice if someone did have a crush on him. But, that'll just be stupid. 

Their other friend, Calum, joined at their spot. "Hey, what's Michael doing?"

"Lukey has a boyfriend." Michael gave a shrug when Luke glared. "What? It's true. Show us the notes."

"It could be from a girl," Calum pointed out. 

"But everyone knows that Luke is gay." Michael pointed at Luke's outfit. "Like, seriously, who wears that?"

"Lots of people!" Luke said, slapping Michael's finger away. "Don't point. It's rude."

" _You're_  rude. No, wait, you're a disappointment to society. Oooh, burn!"

Luke stared, unimpressed. He then averted his attention to Calum, who was already rooting through his backpack. 

"Are these it?" Calum asked, finding crumpled papers. "Oh, wait, these are science notes."

"They're in my wallet," Luke said.

Michael gave an odd look. "Really?"

"Yeah. I mean, like, where else should I put them?" Luke pretended not to notice the way Michael was looking. "Is it weird? You used to store rocks in your socks."

"Yeah, when I was _seven_. Besides, going off topic. Let me see a note."

Luke placed all the notes on the table. It took a moment for his friends to read all of them.

The notes are all typed, always ending with 'xo's'. It surprisingly has good grammar and spelling, but then again, there was always spell check. Luke somewhat believed it was real, but after seeing Calum smiling maybe not. 

"Aw, that's cute," Calum said.

Michael threw the read notes on the table. "Yeah. Maybe if this person found the balls to ask you out, that'll be good." He exchanged a look with Calum.

Luke glanced around the cafeteria room. Nobody seemed to pay attention. Disappointed, he turned back to his friends. "Okay, so was this a prank?"

"No, bro, someone does like you," Calum said.

"Yeah," Michael agreed, tone dull. 

"You have to help me then! Please, please? Wait... what if this person is playing a joke? Oh gosh, I'm—"

"So gay," Michael finished.

Calum shook his head, smiling. "Everybody likes you, Luke."

"Brett doesn't," Luke said, mentioning a senior bully who likes to pick on younger kids.

"Brett can go fuck himself," Michael shouted loudly.

Some noise died down in the room, and glares are shot in the three boys' direction.

"Fuck you, Clifford!" A voice returned, supposedly from Brett.

"Don't swear!" Somebody else said, but from who it was unknown.

Luke thumped his head against the table, only because he saw it in shows when characters became frustrated. It hurt. "Ouch," he mumbled.

. . . . .

After school, Luke walked home with Michael and Calum. They planned to sleep over at his house, mostly play _FIFA_ or _Mario Karts_. 

Calum was busy stepping over the cracks on the sidewalk, Michael joining in. Luke ignored them, way ahead. By the time they arrived at Luke's house, entering the kitchen at their left, Luke's dog, Molly, greeted them with excited barks and tail wags.

Michael started cooing because hey, when you see an adorable puppy what other reaction is there?

Calum started to take food from the fridge, fixing himself a turkey sandwich and glass of lemonade. 

"Where are your parents?" Michael asked, grabbing a bag of chips from the cupboards.

"Work. My mom usually stays late on Tuesday nights for extra student help. And dad's got a meeting." Luke distractedly looked at the clock hanging over the house phone. "We should start a movie."

"I'll pick!" Michael raced Calum to the living room. 

"But you always pick," the kiwi boy pouted.

"Yeah, but you two always pick stupid movies."

"Are we watching  _How I Met Your Mother_?" Luke asked, trailing behind with Molly hot on his heels, hoping for dropped food.

"No." Michael scrunched his nose. "Dude, you have _The Human Centipede 2_? We already classified that we do not get any more. Ugh."

" _Frozen_! _Frozen_!" Calum chanted. "Or _The Little Mermaid_!"

Luke's eyes brightened. "I love _The Little Mermaid_! Michael!"

"Fine," the older boy grumbled and grabbed the DVD, even though he secretly doesn't mind watching it.

As they prepared themselves on the couch, Calum placed his head on Luke's shoulder.

Molly rested on the floor, looking up with sad eyes.

Luke sighed, knowing he was such a sucker for everything she did. "Come on, Molly. Up on the couch." 

"Isn't she too hea—ouch!" Michael groaned as Molly leapt up, lying on both Luke's and his' lap.

Calum tried his best to keep the food out of the way, but ended up moving to the single chair on the end.

It was halfway through the movie when Molly went to sleep in her crate. Michael also closed his eyes, head resting on the armrest and legs propped over Luke's lap.

Calum kept looking at Luke anxiously at certain times. The blue-eyed boy always noticed, to the point when he asked, "Is there a reason you look like you're contemplating on killing me?"

"No, uh. It's just that I've been thinking. About the notes."

"It's dumb, right?" Luke frowned slightly. "I wish it wasn't a prank. I mean, maybe I'm just watching too many shows. But I kinda like having a secret admirer."

"You do."

"How do you know?"

Calum hesitated, avoiding Luke's curious gaze. "Because. They're from, uhm. I know who the person is."

"And?" Luke pressed. "Who is it? You're my best friend, you have to tell me!"

"I-I can't really. I mean..." Calum cautiously glanced at Michael. "Can you lean in closer?"

"Michael's asleep," Luke said, but pushed Michael's legs off and went to the brunet.

"The notes are from me," Calum blurted out, holding his breath for an reaction.

Luke at first looked surprised, then hurt. "Don't tell me, it's fine."

"No! I swear, I wrote those notes. Luke, I have a crush on you. Ever since fifth grade." 

Luke tried to wrap his mind over the words. The Love Notes drove him crazy—he always wondered if the person was funny or serious, shy or open. But he _knew_ Calum. He knew all the quirks, likes and dislikes, how Calum liked Hawaiian pizza and drew _t_ 's with a swoop, how he got car sick easily. The person was not at all a disappointment. It wasn't going to be awkward, because deep down, Luke liked Calum back.

Luke shyly smiled at his friend he knew for four years. "I think I like you too. We'll see how this goes."

Calum has a huge smile on his face, giving a quick peck on Luke's cheek. "You have no idea how long I wanted to say that to you."

They have no idea that Michael is awake, right after Luke went off the couch.

The lavender-haired boy half wished he went to the kitchen or something, but they can't know that he overheard. Michael's stomach felt queasy and heart clenching painfully, almost numb. _Calum likes Luke. Luke likes Calum._  

But, goddammit, Michael wished he could reverse back time so the feelings weren't admitted. They're all friends; that was all it was supposed to be. Because as much as Michael wished, the feelings are never going to be returned.

It took a whole year for Michael to realise that, _fuck_ , he liked Luke, and all he wanted was the courage to ask the younger boy out.

 _It's too late_ , he thought. He already can't stand the way that Calum and Luke are looking at each other. It took a second before Michael realised that he was crying.


	15. Gone Away Like Yesterday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second last chapter. Whoa, I'm getting so sad right now. 
> 
> One of these days I'll have to write a story based off of 'San Francisco' and 'Never Be' because those are my two most favourite 55OS songs ❤️
> 
> But mentioning 5SOS songs, 'The Only Reason', 'Story of Another Us', 'Broken Home', 'The Girl Who Cried Wolf', 'Unpredictable', 'Too Late', 'Long Way Home', 'Wherever You Are', 'Disconnected', 'Hearts Upon Our Sleeves', 'She's Kinda Hot', 'If You Don't Know', 'Amnesia', 'Heartbreak Girl', 'Beside You' are also part of my top list. 'I Can't Remember' is such a cute song. I only wish I could hear 'Airplanes' and 'Never Be' live by 5SOS one day :(
> 
> 'Outer Space / Carry On' - I'm so impressed with it. With the lyrics, it definitely carries a strong message. 'Jet Black Heart' is a special song. So is 'She Looks So Perfect', 'cause honestly, what, that hurts my heart. Throwback. Also 'Pizza'!!! I could rant about more 5SOS songs, like 'Wrapped Around Your Finger', 'Heartache On The Big Screen', or 'Superhero'.
> 
> But main thing: this chapter contains stereotyping. There's also fem!luke, which I live for.

**Gone Away Like Yesterday**

**( Muke )**

The day Michael Clifford notices Luke Hemmings, it's at school. Yeah, it's fucking cliché, but where else will they meet? Michael won't go to some library or the movies or whatever. He's much too of a potato to go out of his room and part from his Xbox.

Anyway, it's Friday and he's not expecting much to happen. Most kids are excited for the weekend, but after school it's a fucking drag to do school work and listen to the teacher's same monotone voice you heard since the first day.

Michael didn't understand math at all, and figures he won't be using half of what he's learned in class in his regular life. What the fuck are derivatives anyway? He's pretty sure it's on his upcoming test, but oh well.

Then, magically, the door opens and some teacher assistant walks in with a student. 

 _Thank you for the distraction_. Michael throws his pencil on the desk and leans back in his seat.

The teacher, Ms. Wallaby, pauses on the topic of differentiation of a function, setting the board marker down. "Is this the new student?"

 _No, it's the Prime Minister from Canada_ , Michael thinks with a snort. He looks curiously at the new student who looks like a shy... girl? She has a black skirt, and black shirt that was kind of big and went over her hands. She kind of has masculine features, though, which totally confuses Michael. There was blond hair styled in a perfect quiff, and a lip ring that Michael can see is kinda hot.

"This is Luke Hemmings,"  the teacher assistant chirps. "He moved into town... yesterday?"

"Monday." Luke shuffles awkwardly, brave enough to only look at the teacher.

 _He_. Michael finds his interest go higher. At his school, he never met anyone that was gay or bi or asexual or at least admitted it. He figures that Luke could be gender fluid, but then again, the fem boy didn't correct on the pronouns.

"You can sit next to Mr. Irwin," Ms. Wallaby says to Luke. "Ashton, please raise your hand."

Michael tries not to scoff. Sure, maybe Luke can get acquainted with the most popular guy in their grade. It's not like he cares, but he thinks that maybe he can befriend the new kid. After all, Michael's a loner and he does need somebody to complain to.

As Luke walks by, Michael practically chokes when he eyes the backside. There's something alluring about the boy in the skirt.

_Fuck, did he really just use the word 'alluring'?_

* * *

When math and science pass by quickly, lunch time finally comes. Michael sits at his regular table, alone. It's actually quite embarrassing - Michael didn't give a shit about other people's opinions, but still. He remembers on the first day sitting alone, earning some sympathy looks from those too-friendly popular people.

_"I feel so sorry for him."_

_"Yeah, he doesn't have any friends."_

Michael honestly hates school and the fucking way people think he wants anyone.

People start talking loudly, and Michael sees the usual huge table that hardly anyone can fit at. Michael plugs his earphones in, but before he can drown himself with loud music to block from the current world he's at, there's a person standing right behind him.

"H-Hey."

Michael curses, whirling around. "Are you trying to give me a heart attack?"

"Sorry!" The new kid looks apologetic.

"Where's your friend?" Michael asks, resisting the urge to roll his eyes.

"I don't have one." Luke nervously glances at the chair beside Michael. "Can I sit with you?"

"Yeah. Okay." For some reason, Michael's heart is thumping. He might have a friend... not like he wants one, but still. Maybe they can bond over music, go to each other's house, share the love of complaining—

"So, what music do you listen to?" Luke questions, as if reading Michael's mind.

Michael shrugs. " _Green Day_. _All Time Low_. Little of _Panic! at the Disco_." He eyes the fem boy, realizing that maybe their music tastes are different. He suspects Luke may listen to opera, or jazz if adventurous.

"I listen to them too!" Luke says excitedly. "Also _blink-182_ , and when I was younger it was _Good Charlotte_."

"Seriously? I thought you, like, listen to ballet or something," Michael blurts out unthinkingly.

Luke raises his eyebrows, which somehow make him look more attractive if possible. "Yeah, and I sometimes compete in fashion shows and watch _Barbie_."

"..."

"I was kidding."


	16. First Impressions, Dumb Decisions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First dates are... interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ 8.10.2017 - draft ]  
> Thank you. Ily ily ily xo

[Luke Rapping 2k14](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eSUD_sWmtZ0) (April 18th) vs. [Luke Rapping 2k15](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=O5RGp4rNM6E) (July 27th)

* this is so damn adorable and asdfghjk I die. 

* * *

 Luke takes a sip from his drink, the hot chocolate burning his tongue. He winces for a millisecond before placing the cup back down. He's nervous, but tries to make a nice conversation. Talking... is nice.

The person across from him looks down at one of the menus, not looking up once.

 _God, this is so awkward_.

Luke wishes he can be one of those people who say something interesting. Like his friend Ashton—who is pretty much awesome at talking. 

"Do... do you watch any TV?" It sounds lame the moment the words fall out.

"Uh, yeah." Michael briefly looks up.

Michael Clifford, the freaking gorgeous boy in his grade actually asks Luke - a total nerd - out. Luke kinda thinks it's a joke, but Michael is right there, dressed in jeans and a striped shirt.

The waitress thankfully heads in their direction with a basket of bread and a small platter of butter. "Will you like to order?"

"Thank you." Michael (finally!) sets down the menu. "What will you like, Luke?"

"I'll have the, uh, spaghetti. Thanks."

"Can I please have the burger?"

The waitress jots down the orders before taking their menus.

Luke sneaks a peek at Michael, and blue eyes meet green.

 _Talk about anything!_ Luke scolds himself, looking away. _Michael must think I'm so boring, and awkward_. Instead, he takes another sip, wincing. He pushes his sleeves over his hands. Michael coughs, and the date carries on.

 

\---

 

After the dinner, Luke wants nothing more than to cry and feel broken up. The date did not go well, as they mostly ate and had one-minute conversations. His scald tongue couldn't really enjoy the pasta, either, which officially makes it the worse date ever.

Michael walks the blond home, the streetlight glowing dimly upon them. There's a slight chill, only their footsteps the noise.

"Thanks," Luke mumbles, as they walk down the driveway to the porch.

"Do you want to go out again?"

Luke can't decide if the suggestion is out of pity or seriousness. Michael's face is unreadable, though, and for a moment he considers slamming the door in the older boy's face. _How can He be so oblivious?_ "If you want to."

"I really do."

"I mean, this night was horrible."

Michael raises his eyebrows. Then he laughs, the sound echoing out into the night.

Luke feels a bit hurt, because he does not want to be laughed at. _What was so funny? Was this all a joke? It was too good to be true anyway. Nobody will actually like him_. The blond looks down at his shoes dejectedly.

"I'm sorry, but oh god - I thought it was only me." Michael runs a hand through his hair, eyes crinkling. "I was so nervous to talk to you."

Mouth agape, Luke's head snaps up.

"Yeah, you were just so pretty, I was probably going to say something stupid."

The two boys stand at the doorstep, neither one moving. Their eyes meet, faces close enough so that if one leans in -

Luke smiles shyly, producing his key out of his pocket. "I will like to go out with you again."

"Cool. Great. I'll call you."

Luke waves goodbye - again a stupid move - but Michael waves back.

When Luke closes the door behind him, a smile appears on his face. Even though it wasn't the best date, Michael was so endearing and his laugh!

His phone buzzes, and taking it out, he sees a message from Michael. A fluttering feeling spreads in his stomach.

_**See you later cutie. Good night :)** _


End file.
